As I mentioned on my previous post, I had a conflict with my best friend and we actually stopped taking for awhile.
For context, she was with me since 2017 and I got together with my boyfriend at that time in 2018 being new to relationship, I was devoted to my boyfriend and spent majority’s of my time together with him. We would hang in large group and my bestfriend would be there.
However, I realised she started to distant herself from me and the other group and talked to me lesser. My other bestfriend told me she was actually sad about how I only spent time with my boyfriend and did not have alone time with her. Knowing that, I just decided to check on her without saying much despite knowing the full situation and eventually we stopped talking as I still stuck with my boyfriend 24/7.🥲
But in 2019, we were in the same class and I was assigned the seat next to her at first it was awkward. I tried making small talks with her and she was super dry back. Afterwards, I muster the courage to talked to her about what had happen and apologise for my childish behaviour previously. We clarified about it and understood each other better through the whole situation. 🙏🏼😭
1. Communication 🗣️
If u have a problem with your bestfriend, don’t sweep in under a rug like we did talk it out. It’s honestly better to confront one another and better understand each other than just letting it slide so that you “avoid the awkwardness“ or “afraid of losing the friendship” because frankly speaking you will actually loose your friendship eventually if the problem or conflict isn’t resolved. There’s no point feeling awkward about this kind of confrontation as it will honestly strengthen the friendship more compared to all your fears.
2. Quality time ⏰
If u have a significant other don’t forget about your bestfriend like I did. Including them in your hang outs won’t help ! It just creates awkwardness for them as they are literally third wheeling! Talked to your bestfriend and maybe set hangout days for them specifically just you both and no others! Don’t do what I did calling her on friend group hangouts but neglecting her as I thought she would be entertained by my other friends becaus sometimes they just want YOU and you only!
3. Put yourself in their shoes 👞
Imagine you were them, how would you feel watching your bestfriend with her boyfriend 24/7 and neglecting you? How would you feel if she called you out to hangout just to leave you with the other friend? How would you feel if you’re the one third wheeling instead? Don’t do what your wouldn’t like to others it’s not fair for them.
Anyways, that’s all from me. Me and my bestfriend friendship has been stronger day by day and I eventually broke up that relationship. And who was there to pick me up? My best friend. So don’t neglect your friend and talk to them and resolve the conflict between you guys!
